I will get back from Portugal in 8 days, and after that my updating will get back to usual. Updating from abroad is really expensive and tumblr on your phone isn’t really the best thing in the world. I’ve missed you all and I will continue to miss you until I get back to Sweden and get back to you guys. Have a great week and I’ll see you in a short while!
We miss you, Alex :( your blog's still the best columbine blog by far and your posts are always great. Ps. You're the prettiest girl I've ever seen. Pps. Your hair is fucking gorgeous.
Oh my god, you’re the sweetest person ever! Thank you so so so much for this message. It really lit up my day. I promise to get back to you once I get home from Portugal, and my blog will be as active as it always was. Thank you, again. You’re a beautiful person. x
hey do you have any advice on writing to killers in prison? i really wanna do it sometime but i have no idea how to start. thanks!!
Just tell them who you are and why you are writing, that’s a good start! They appreciate knowing who’s writing them and why, and sending them a picture of you isn’t a bad idea either. Once you start, it’ll all float on and it’ll all turn out just fine. Good luck!
Honestly, I think it's like with the whole Cobain case, they all of the sudden decided to release crime scene photos when the 20th year of his death came about. Perhaps, and I am not holding my breath here, but just maybe, when the 20th anniversary of Columbine comes, they just might "leak" something new.
That could be. If they will ever release the tapes at all, I think they’ll do it because they want or need to, and not because we want them to. As I said, these petitions have been held before and people have been wanting to see the tapes for an extremely long time; and since they haven’t released them yet, our opinions obviously don’t affect their decisions. We can only hope to see the tapes someday.
"Dylan wasn’t so much into lyrics. When it came to techno, says Devon, "Like, the more bass he could get in that music, like subwoofers and stuff, the better. He really liked that. A lot of it is mostly instrumental, which he liked a lot. He didn’t have to deal with all the lyrics and stuff. He wanted to make up his own mind what the music was about. He did not like to be told what to be feeling. He was an individual. He always strove to be an individual. He didn’t always succeed. You can just lose yourself in techno music. I remember nights staying up with him and he just drifted off. Music shuts off the outside world."
- Columbine: A True Crime Story by Jeff Kass.
i think you might find this interesting, when my grandma was younger she went to look round John Cristie's flat - but decided he was creepy so didnt move in. and then yrs later they discovered that he gassed and murdered the occupants of the flat
Wow, that is indeed very interesting and I’m really glad you shared this with me. It’s scary to just think about it too, as she obviously could have been one of the victims. Do you know what she thought was creepy about him? Was it just a general feeling she got when meeting him or did he say or do anything specifically that made her think that way?
Again, thanks for sharing. This was really interesting. It kind of gave me a small case of the heebie-geebies too.
What was that list on the left side of Eric's racial slurs page? A shopping list? lol
Haha I have no idea! It certainly looks like it. What a combination; racial slurs and shopping lists. One of the items in the list is “Dylan and Eric”; I wonder what he meant by writing that together with all of the other stuff in the list.
Is it bad that I don't let my anger out? Whenever I get angry, I just keep it inside me. And sometimes it hurts my heart or my whole body. I feel like I want to hit or punch something. But I don't, I just leave it as it is...
It’s not healthy to keep your emotions inside of you, especially ones like anger as it’s such a strong, destructive feeling; and it’s not uncommon for anger to control your general state of mind, such as it did with Dylan and Eric. Different people have different methods of letting their anger out - and the most important thing is to let it out in a way that doesn’t hurt you or anyone else. Keeping anger inside can make it build up and eventually make you explode, without you being able to control it. It also hurts you, just like you say, both mentally and physically. Anger often makes you act out in violent ways so punching something (a boxing bag, maybe?) is a common way of letting it out, alongside screaming or throwing things. However, punching things as a way of letting your anger out could become a habit and therefore might make some people (not all) use that method in other situations: situations where someone else might get hurt. You seem to be able to control your anger, which is great, but you’re using that control in the wrong way. Instead of controlling it by keeping it inside, you could control it by acting out in non-violent ways that still make the feelings come out by intense physical activity, which will make your body tired and at the same time produce endorphins etc. This will make your body feel both calmer and generally better. When angry, it’s always good to act out in ways that makes your body produce adrenaline, so running or working out and whatnot works very well for some.
It seems like your anger is a general mental issue of yours too, as it affects you a lot. I would suggest that you, if you don’t already do, seek professional help to be able to cope with your anger and not let it affect you as much. I’m always glad to help and I’d love to do so, but I can’t provide you with the same help as a professional could as that’s impossible to do online. I hope this gave you some guidance, and if you want to ask me anything or if you’d like to talk then don’t hesitate to write me again. Take care. x
Have you seen or heard anything about the petition going around for the Basement tapes to be released to the public?
Yes, I’ve both seen and heard about it. This is not the first time a petition is circulating around the Columbine community for this cause, and obviously (unfortunately), a petition hasn’t worked any of the other times. I don’t think that JeffCo will release the tapes even if this petition gets the amount of signatures needed, but hey - it doesn’t hurt keep trying, so you should all sign it if you want to. It won’t get worse, at least.
Excerpts from an interview with friends and acquaintances of Eric and Dylan:
Meg Hains: I am black/white mixed. And when the media is coming up with this thing that Dylan and Eric were racist, they weren’t. They were my friends. They were very nice to me, both of them. I don’t get this whole racial thing that people are coming up with.
Devon Adams: Dylan and Eric did use racial slurs. Because, unfortunately, it’s becoming common. And what I have heard is they did call Isaiah an N before they shot him. I don’t think it meant that they were racist. I think that they were just using the word that they - unfortunately it’s true that it has bearing from the movies and TV - that they had learned is O.K.
Interviewer: What about the Nazi stuff?
Meg Hains: That is the biggest load of [expletive] I’ve ever heard. They never wore swastikas around their arm. Never. Not in this entire year that I’ve known them. No.
Dustin Thurman: Everyone said that they saluted to Hitler after a strike in bowling and stuff. That wasn’t true. If they got a strike, they would just sit down.
Devon Adams: If Dylan and Eric were like neo-Nazis or whatever, then they kept it secret. They didn’t proclaim it. And I don’t think Dylan was.
"Let’s block out last week when I say this - they hadn’t done anything physically wrong to people. I mean, they dressed different. So? They wore black. So what? It’s just, they were hated and so they felt they hated back. They hated back.”
- Devon Adams about Eric and Dylan.