"You don’t consciously know who I am, & doubtedly unconsciously too. I, who write this, love you beyond infinice. I think about you all the time, how this world would be a better place If you loved me as I do you. I know what you’re thinking: "(some psycho wrote me this harassing letter)" I hoped we could have been together… you seem a lot like me. Pensive, quiet, an observer, not wanting what is offered here (school, life, etc.) You almost seem lonely, like me. You probably have a boyfriend, though, & might have not given this note another thought. I have thought you my true love for a long time now, but… well… there was hesitation. You see I can’t tell if you think of anyone as I do you, & if you did who that would be. Fate put me in need of you, yet this Earth blocked that with uncertainties. I will go away soon, but I just had to write this to you, the the one I truly loved. Please, for my sake, dont tell anyone about this, as it was only meant for you. Also, please don’t feel any guilt about my soon-to-be “absense” of this world. [arrow points to a note in the margin that reads: “It is solely my decision: nobody else’s.”] Oh… the the thoughts of w us… doing everything together, not necessarily anything, just to be together would have been pure heaven heaven. I guess it’s Time time to tell you who I am. I was in a class with you 1st semester, & was blessed w. being with you in a report. I still remember your laugh. Innocent, beautiful, pure. This semester I still see you rarely. I am entranced during 5th period, as we both have it off. To most people, I appear.. well… almost scary, but that’s who I appear to be as people are afraid of what they don’t understand. I denied who I was for a long time. until high school…
Anyway, you have noticed me a few times, I catch every one of these gazes w. an open heart. I think you know who I am by now. Unfortunately… you even if you did like me even the slightest bit, you would hate hate me if you knew who I was. I am a criminal, I have done things that almost nobody would even think about condoning. The reas reason that I’m writing you now is that I have been caught for the crimes I comitted, & I went want to go to a new existence. You know what I mean. (Suicide) I have have nothing to live for, & I won’t be able to survive in this world after this legal conviction.However However, if it was true that you loved me as I do you,… I would find a way to survive. Anything to be with you. [arrow points to margin where Dylan writes: I would enjoy life knowing that you loved me.] 99/100 chances you prob. think I’m crazy, & want to stay as far away as possible. If that’s the case, then I’m very sorry for involving an innocent person in my problems, & please don’t think twice. However, If you are are who I hoped for in my dreams dreams & realitiesrealities, then do me this a favor: Leave Leave a piece of paper in my locker, [arrow to margin note reading: “Locker #837 — combo=19-37-9 —near the library”] saying anything that comes to you. Well, I guees guess this is it— goodbye & I love(d) you.”
- Dylan Klebold’s love letter.
- The teachers came into the classroom Aaron Hancey, Columbine student, was hiding in, asking if anybody knew first aid. -
Aaron: “I told them I did, and then we made a mad dash across the hallway. Bombs were still exploding, guns were still being fired; they (the shooters) could come around the corner any time. And then we went to the back doors into the core science room where I found Dave Sanders.
When I first got to Dave, he’s conscious, just fully aware of what’s going on. So when we got to him, he was on his stomach. I thought he had been shot with a shotgun or something, in the chest at close range or something like that. When I looked over the situation - yeah he’d been shot and that’s no small cookie, but he’s conscious and he’s very aware of his surroundings. I thought we were gonna be able to take him out and that he could get fixed and get operated on if it needs to be, and recovered.”
-Aaron Hancey is now struggling to keep Dave Sanders conscious. With the help of a teacher and another student, as well as his father who is phoning in first aid advice from home, Aaron uses family pictures from Dave Sanders wallet to keep him talking.-
Aaron: “I think it really did help him with the pictures because we could get away from “how are you feeling? where does it hurt?”. Just get away from the pessimistic side of things and try to be optimistic and to see the things he did love.
I found out the next morning that Dave had died. It came as a big chock because I thought we could take him out and he could go get operated on and start the recovery process. It broke my heart to think that he did die. Because I tried my best.”
On tumblr I saw someone analyze how the bombs wouldve been ineffective even if they did go off because of the type they were trying to make (the BLEVE or something) wouldve been put out by the sprinkler system before it created its secondary and hugest explosion. Yet, professionals who've worked on the case say they would've killed hundred. In your understanding, would the bombs have worked as the analysts said or do you think the person who made that post is correct?
It depends on how you see it. If the plan would have not had any inaccuracies and the bombs would just have exploded, then these bombs would claim a lot of casualties, as the experts say. The bombs were really big and people near them would definitely die by the explosions if an explosion was the case. But however, Eric and Dylan did not count some things in when planning their bombing. This goes for, for example, the sprinkler system as you mentioned and the fire alarms going off.
Eric and Dylan’s propane bombs were supposed to explode by getting heat up by fire, which makes the liquid propane evaporate and rise to the top of the tank. This makes the pressure build up and get stronger inside of the tank, and finally the propane will go out into the atmosphere.
Their propane bombs were in other words supposed to explode by being exposed to fire, and propane tanks rarely actually explode after being exposed to fire. So the fire would have to burn for a while next to the propane tank in order for it to explode - and this fire would have been put out by the sprinkler system. That’s that.
So that post is correct, but the professionals are correct in their own way too. That post explains why the bombs didn’t go off, but not that the size of them wouldn’t claim a lot of casualties. You can read about the cafeteria bombs and why they failed to go off + how propane bombs work etc here on Dylanklebold.com.
Can you link me the post where Eric did a school paper And wrote his full name with a characteristic of him for each letter?
I think its pretty good, the Jeffrey Dahmer files I mean. Its a little slow but you hear some new prospects on the situation (well they were new to me, I don't run a crime blog like you tho so I know less)
That’s interesting. I’d love to watch it then, no matter how much I know about the case already, as it’s always interesting to watch something about a subject you’re interested in. Thank you for the tip, dearie. I’ve heard that it’s supposed to be quite experimental and not like other documentaries, is that an accurate description in your opinion?
No. Not by any means. Eric and Dylan were equally responsible for planning, carrying out and thinking about the massacre. The reason for why people may view Eric as the leader is because Eric’s major emotional personality trait was anger while Dylan’s was depression, and anger is often viewed as a more dominant trait than sadness/depression, as anger makes you act out in more dominant ways such as violence towards others. Other reasons for people believing in this myth may be the media’s portrayal of the boys and Dave Cullen’s bullshit book. However, Dylan wanted this just as much as Eric and he even mentioned it way before Eric did. During the massacre, Dylan was the happy and giddy one, who was having the time of his life. He wouldn’t be happy and overwhelmed by positive emotions if he didn’t want this.
If the basement tapes were to be released, I believe that more people would get a better look into the boys’ friendship and how they affected each other. They did fuel each other’s bad ideas and negative views and emotions, but they did this equally much to each other. Eric fueled Dylan’s bad sides and Dylan fueled Eric’s bad sides. No part was taking control over the other and if one of them didn’t want to do this, the other wouldn’t make him do it.
You may have been asked this before but how many people do you think would have died if Dylan and Eric's bombs were effective?
I think that it would easily be a three-digit number of people, but not as many as they hoped to kill. Maybe 100-150, as the bombs were extremely powerful and destructive, but a lot of people survive bombings depending on where they’re located in relation to the bomb (and in this case, there were two big bombs implanted, that would cause major destruction and chaos). However, the plan was to kill fleeing students too, so if the bombs went off and they started killing survivors, the number could easily increase a bit. I’d say that there would be loads of injured students too, easily more than double the number.
Hi! I've started reading your blog recently, and I like it very much! :) I'd like to usk you about Susan Dewitt. How she's doing now? Is she married? And If you know anything about life of other girls Eric and Dylan liked, tell about them :) Thanks!
Thank you so much dear! I’m really glad you appreciate it and I hope you will continue doing so.
Susan DeWitt is doing well now for all I know and I’ve heard that she is married, or at least she was so she still is if nothing’s happened.
I thought that I might as well make a post with this information as it will be a bit longer, if that’s okay with you. So I’ll make a post with the information I know about those girls soon! :)
R.I.P to all 15 victims who lost their lives 15 years ago today.
Randy knew that some teenagers out there viewed Eric and Dylan as heroes, who went out in style and did something amazing, who put the statement out there and all that. So he thought that by showing the world how they ended up - with their brains blown out by their own gunshots - that people wouldn’t idolize them as much. Because they didn’t go out in style, but rather “cowardly” according to him. He had to fight for actually getting the rights to release them but eventually he could.
Dustin Harrison, Columbine student from Eric’s psychology class: ”Eric just basically said that he was having some reoccurring troubles with this reoccurring dream. That he woke up one morning and he came into the school and he just started shooting students and teachers as they came by. And then he said it always ended up with him just blowing the school up.”
Steve E. Pitt, D.O: "The cynical side of me and the more clinical side of me says that that wasn’t a dream, but that that was just another way of perhaps either making intimidating or threatening comments, which is to the extreme cynical side. Or if you take it that it could have been, it could have been a guy who said "Gee, I know there’s a problem here. Please come and help me.”“
did they photograph all of the deceased, like they did with eric and dylan? if so, why weren't those photos leaked like theirs were?
Eric and Dylan’s death photos weren’t leaked by the police but by Brooks Brown’s father, Randy Brown. I don’t know if the other deceased had pictures taken of them, but if that’s so then at least they’re not made public but kept locked, just like the basement tapes. The pictures that exist of the deceased are the ones outside of the school.